# 1 Chase

It was, at first, a conquest-

a project, even,

the pursuit of the unlikely,

the thrill of the crazy chase,

and the vindication of my own charms.

It was, at first,

about only myself

and my obsession.

But now, by and by,

when I get better,

I also get worse -

only because

now I want more –

more than mere victory,

or reaching the finish line.

It is, now-

a dream, delirium;

a craving, even,

the pursuit of intimacy,

and the warmth of reassurance.

It is, now-

a gentler, stiller, trail

but harder,

so much harder.